Tug-of-War

Any parent can appreciate the following anology--parenting is like a game of tug-of-war. I don't know about you, but the image of me on one side of the rope and the kids, husband, family duties on the other side has recently been popping up in my head (kinda like a comic strip balloon pop-up). Is it wrong to want to dedicate time to myself? I constantly find myself torn between giving the kids their much-needed one-on-one time, or trying to find more healthful, and sometimes complicated meals, for the family, dedicating those last few hours before going to sleep to my hubby--and giving myself some time to do basic things like cut my nails or even FLOSS!! Life is kinda crazy right now, and I'm sure in 10 years I'll laugh at how chaotic this small clip of my life was. But for now I feel that I have every right to hold my own in this tug-of-war. If I give in sometimes it's good: for the kids, the hubby, the home, family life in general. If I don't give in sometimes it's also good: it gives mom sanity and a feeling of self--which after all is needed if you're going to keep the anchor of the family going. If I'm not feeling satisfied, and whole, it can wreak havoc on the family at the end. So, one of my biggest goals in 2014 is to take time for myself, unapologetic, without regrets--it's become essential to my well-being. I'm already feeling much cheerier and hopeful at the thought of this. It's as if some burden has been lifted off of me--you are allowed to be happy, to look good (at times), to be selfish and want things just for yourself. Yay ME!

Merry Christmas...we're alive!

We had a rough holidays this year. I say rough because we were sick, everyone except little princess. Some nasty cold virus that is going around. But staying home and not traveling was probably a blessing in disguise. I was wearing myself out with a busy schedule. My husband was as well. The kids were probably suffering from a little bit of TV syndrome--that empty look that goes on their faces when the TV comes on.

It was a good thing I got sick. I think I finally realized that I need to start taking time for myself. The kids might go crazy, the house might be messy, it might seem chaotic at times. But I was seriously suffering from lack of TLC for myself. I'm still working on it. I feel that my body is slowly waking up. Hopefully soon, I will be able to get back into a workout routine. My mood is already looking brighter. Even sexually, I've perked up. 2014 might just be a year of change. Just like everything, this decision to take care of myself was a long time coming. I had heard it from my mom, my sister, even good friends. I had also seen other poor souls who I felt needed to take time out for themselves. Finally, I don't feel guilty anymore. For some reason, I felt as if taking time out for myself was neglecting my children. WRONG. Actually taking time for myself is being a good and better mom for my kids. I don't want them to see pictures of me tired and bedraggled all the time. I want them to have a good image of me. I want to be active, fun, engaging. Not simply going through the paces of motherhood. I'm very excited about this realization. Yay me!! Now of course, every day is a small step towards that committment that I've made. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain.